Are You in Control?

First a brief psychology lesson

People perceive things in different ways; our perceptions are colored to some degree by our past experiences.  People also have different ways of explaining why things happen to them, this is called attributional style, a central theme to my Master’s Thesis.  A closely related concept is the subject of this post: Locus of Control (LOC).  People generally have either an internal or external LOC.  An internal LOC, means the person sees themselves as in control of most of what happens to them; where those with external LOC see outside forces in charge of most events in their lives.

Why does this matter?  Generally those with an external LOC are harder to motivate, they tend to believe that there is nothing they can do to change things because external forces are in control.  A person with an internal LOC believes they have the ability to affect outcomes in their lives, so they will make more of an effort to improve their lives.

Can LOC be changed?

You can change how you perceive things, but not easily.  It took a whole lifetime of experiences to get you where you are now, that can’t be changed in a few days.  Any deeply ingrained belief can be changed only with concerted effort and strong motivation to do so.

The primary technique for changing long held beliefs is to question your beliefs, make yourself prove the belief to be correct.  This can be very difficult for many people to do on their own. If their beliefs are strong enough it will be almost impossible to see the proof that you are in control of most things.  If that is the case and you really do want to change your beliefs you will need the help of a trained cognitive behavioral therapist.  A good therapist is trained to ask the best questions that will get your mind to open up to new possibilities.  Or you may know someone who is optimistic and believes they are in control of their life that would be willing to help you.  If that person can question your beliefs based on their own beliefs you may start to see the point of view of a person with an internal LOC.

Once you have broken through your resistance to a new way of thinking you can use affirmations, visualization and self-hypnosis to continue retraining your mind with a new sense of control. You will also need to be constantly aware of your thoughts and correct yourself when you are mentally giving control to an external force.

Action Does It

Thinking, questioning, visualizing are important techniques, but that alone won’t guarantee your new way of looking at the world.  Taking action on your new beliefs is what will cement those beliefs in your mind.  As you take action you will gain more and more evidence that you to have the ability to effect changes in your life.

Action Item:  Take this test from Psychology Today to see if you are in control.